The Kingdom Of Clever Else and Simple Hans

[Sally Fitch/Clever Else]

"My family was starving.... I had to, gods forgive me!" The peasant farmer clutched at the threadbare cap in his hands, arms seized by palace guards on either side. "But had I known that the grain was for the Royal Banquet..." the man swallowed his words and threw himself to the ground. "Please, your majesties, HAVE MERCY!"

King Hans sat on his ornate throne, looking rather uncomfortable in his courtly attire. He shifted in his seat, thinking hard. "He stole." he said at last, careful with his words. "...So we should... throw him in the dungeon?" Hans glanced at his Queen beside him for confirmation.

Now it was Else's turn to be uncomfortable in her chair. With a low sigh, but with excruciating patience, she rose from her throne and knelt by her husband's chair for complete eye contact, as she would with a child. "My Lord, perhaps now would be a good time to meet with the Land Regent, to discuss the upcoming Harvest. I'll see to these courtly matters personally."

Hans' face lit up. Farming was in his blood and brains...and that was just about it, unfortunately. He grabbed her hand and roughly pressed it to his lips. "Thanks Else...er... My Queen...Lady...er... ma'am." With this clumsy salutation, his muscular frame leaped up from the throne and scampered off.

Else shook her head with another sigh, yet a slight smile at her husband's innocence, and gracefully stood to her full height. She made her way down to the seized peasant and waved the guards away. Else touched the top of his head. "Please rise." she beckoned. "For I am no more noble born then you are." The peasant looked stricken, as if this was some sort of trap, but her warm face inspired him to rise. "You will go free from this place, and with more then enough food to last you and your family through the season. For my husband tells me that the north region has suffered great losses due to some mysterious curse upon one of the main plots. You are a farmer there, yes?"

The man could not believe her words. He almost missed her question completely. "...Why... y-yes... Yes!" he managed through disbelief. "My land is right next to the plot... it has seeped into the soil. Tainted everything. Something about a Witch having some of her rampion crop stolen... I'm not sure, my lady..."

"Then we will send our best magicians to get to the root of it; heal the land." Else could hear an objection over the verdict from one of the countless advisers lined up behind her throne. "This is my judgement, esteemed Lords. I cannot punish an innocent man for doing what even I would do in his place. He is a link in the chain of our Kingdom, as all subjects are. Instead of simply removing the link with malice, I say we reinforce it with new iron; to strengthen the entire chain as a whole." Else prayed that would satisfy the advisers, for the man's sake. When no one objected, she turned back to the peasant. "You are free to go."

As she turned to sit back in her throne, the man fell to his feet in joy and grabbed the hem of her gown, kissing it profusely. Else nearly tripped over her dress in the processes, but steadied herself on the throne. She hoped none of the advisers had caught it, or else she would hear about it later in her etiquette lessons on 'grace and pose'. As the man blubbered his 'thank yous', the guards men pried him away from her gown and escorted him out of the chamber. Else sat down with a slight plop and blew some loose hair off of her forehead with a strong sigh.

Only 34 more cases to attended to.

[Robin Hood/Jezabel Williams]

It was bound to happen at some point- Robin found herself being dragged into the courtroom of some pompous, snide, Royal. Robin growled as she was thrown to the floor. She hoped her mustache would hold up and her true identity-far more precious- wouldn't be discovered and touched up the fine points of her fake facial hair.

"Your Majesty! Robin Hood of Loxley - the wanted rogue of Knottingham- was discovered within the Castle walls! He's wanted for theft, treason, arson, conspiring with other outlaws such as The Pied Piper and witches as well, desecration of government property, involvement in the Killing of Former King Richard," The guard listed of- Robin's ears perked at the mention of her fathers death, had she really been accused of-? Robin silently fumed knowing how wrong the guard was about her fathers death, ," and Murder. Your Majesty there is a fine bounty on this man's head, Prince John would pay us handsomely if we brought Robin to him"

Robin glanced up at the Queen, she didn't seem like she was corrupt or cruel as so many other Rulers of the lands had been, she silently shifted to her knees and hoped that maybe The Queen had also heard of the GOOD things Robin was doing for the poor, oppressed people of Knottingham.

[Sally Fitch/Clever Else]

Else blinked. "Well... that is certainly a long list of grievances." She then addressed the guardsmen who had spoken. "As for the bounty, no amount of gold can buy rain for our droughts, or sun for the crop...so what use do we need of it?"

"I only meant... it was only a suggestion..." the guardsman fumbled.

"I will take it into consideration... after debate with my husband and his advisers." She answered, not unkind, but clearly curt.

"Yes, your majesty..."

Else glanced back at the fugitive. "Are these accusations correct, Robin of Loxley?" She asked. "We have heard of King Richard's fair rule even in this land... gods help you if you had a hand in his untimely death."

[Robin Hood/Jezabel Williams]

"Aye, MOST of them," Robin admitted as she got to her feet, she had gotten pretty good at hiding the her feminine voice and stance. She answered The Queen confidently though refused to make any note of her high position as Queen," but I most certainly had nothing to do with King's death, I promise you that"

[Sally Fitch/Clever Else]

The rudeness of the prisoner made the guardsman's blood boil. "You will refer to the Queen by her ordained station, you piece of-"

"Sir Jenson!" Else snapped. Her nerves had just about enough of his barking. "Enough. I will hear out the accused, uninterrupted." The Queen looked upon Robin once more. "Most of them? Theft? Conspiring? And Murder? How do you justify your actions? And why should I let you go, when you may cause harm to either my people or another kingdom's?"

Else was met with silence. "Robin of Loxley... you were brought here to plead your case. Not to be executed. Please... give me a reason why I shouldn't very well lock you away where you will never hurt another living soul."

[Robin Hood/Jezabel Williams]

Robin shot a cocky smile at the guard before returning her attention to the Queen.

"I admit that outside of regicide I have committed all of those crimes- though I'm guessing all of the information your guards have received are from bias sources. Anything I do that's considered 'wrong' by the Phoney King of England is justified when observed from the eyes of the poor people of Knottingham," Robin straightened and met the Queens eyes," The People of Knottingham have been taxed to the point of starvation, no one can afford food for themselves; and when they can't pay their taxes the Sheriff of Knottingham finds them and... well the best case would be imprisonment till they can pay off their debt. I fight for them because no one else can.... what I was doing in your kingdom.... I promise I most certainly was not there to hurt any of your subjects"

[Sally Fitch/Clever Else]

"Well spoken... for a mere rogue." Else raised an eyebrow. Clearly there was more to this Loxley. The passion and conviction behind the youth's words... and political awareness. "I know what it is to resort to vile acts in the name of... of what was right." She closed her eyes. She could almost smell the burning flesh of the evil sorcerer and his cannibal groomsmen once again.

Her dark eyes snapped open. "But I do not bear such acts on my conscience as proudly as you do, young Robin of Loxley."

An adviser stepped forward. "My Lady, it is CLEAR what should be done... hand the criminal over to Prince John. If anything, just to be RID of this thief."

The Queen sat, thinking. "Take him to the dungeon. Further deliberation is needed."

[Robin Hood/Jezabel Williams]

"what?!" Robin snapped," being proud of your people is not a sin! Well- in small amounts, Everything I do is to protect them!"

Sir Jenson reached for her but Robin whipped around and shoved him hard, though the shackles that had been secured to her wrists and ankles made it difficult to move," Please! I wouldn't be in this kingdom if I didn't have them in mind!"

Jenson had stumbled back a bit but as he regained his footing, two guards had come to his assistance and grabbed Robins arms. She fought back but to no avail, she was dragged off into the dungeons and left to mope in the dark

[Sally Fitch/Clever Else]

A hooded figure walked soundlessly down the flights of stone stairs later that night, all the way down to the dimly lit dungeons. She made her way to where Robin was being kept and put a hand up to silence the guard before he could bark an inquiry about her presence. She raised a simple locket up to his face; the circular, polished wooden pendant had a small golden bird mounted on the front. The guardsmen took one look at it... and simply walked away from his post without a word. But not before handing the hooded woman the cell's keys.

She silently put the key in the lock and opened the door. She beckoned with a gloved index finger for the prisoner to follow. She turned to lead the way down a corridor.

[Robin Hood/Jezabel Williams]

Robin raised an eyebrow but didn't hesitate long, she got to her feet and followed the figure out,"Thank you....."

[Sally Fitch/Clever Else]

The hooded figure turned to Robin and raised a finger to her own lips to hush him. She then looked past the alleged thief, hearing a commotion of voices at the dungeon's entrance.

She grabbed Robin's arm and began to run, hoping her companion would keep up. In and out they weaved, down a maze of never ending corridors.

[Robin Hood/Jezabel Williams]

Robin could keep up okay, but it was difficult keeping track of where they were. She tried taking notes of the turns and weaves but it was useless

[Sally Fitch/Clever Else]

She finally halted in front of what appeared to be a wall, but when she reached up to take a torch from it's holder, the wall opened. She handed the torch to a bewildered Robin and removed a bow and quiver from underneath her cloak.

"I'm afraid I couldn't retrieve yours from the armory." Else apologized, finally speaking for the first time. "Not without drawing too much attention." Else drew back her hood. "Follow the passage, always take the straight path, and you shall find your way out. And take this." She put the pendant in Robin's hand. "It will get you to our borders without trouble."

[Robin Hood/Jezabel Williams]

Robin was speechless as she took the items," I... I can't thank you enough....." Robin turned down the passage after bowing and giving a quick, Wink.

As soon as she was out of sight, she silently apologized. But she needed her bow.... it was a personal matter. Robin turned up the corridor and looked about the hall... it had to be somewhere. Robin tried to avoid any guards if she could, having a bit more respect for The Queen of this land she didn't want to fill her castles defense with arrows.

Eventually she found a locked door that was clearly where they were clearly holding her things. She knelt down and began working on the lock....

[Simple Hans/Fletcher Fitch]

It was purely by chance... and stupidity... that King Hans had happened to stumble upon the little man crouched down low. He just barely avoided plowing over the lad with his large frame. He did that sometimes.

"Oh...hullo." Hans said cheerfully. "I was following Else... cause she usually she comes to wish me a good night... but she didn't tonight... and that is strange. So I looked for her and found her coming down here... only NOT here. I think I got lost... it was more... over there..." He pointed towards one of the numerous dark tunnels. "I think." He then finally noticed what the strange little man had in his hands and what he was attempting to do. "Oh..."

"..."

"..."

"You need a KEY for that, little man. Else would know where to find the keys..." He picked up the little man and hoisted him over a broad shoulder. All of the arrows from the quiver spilled out onto the floor in the process. "Let's go ask Else!"

Just then a troop of palace guards arrived, swords drawn. "Your majesty!" one said. "Do you need assistance-"

"We're goin' to see Else." He replied, smiling.

"...with the prisoner?"

".... We're going to see Else." He repeated. Why did he have to repeat himself? He was KING wasn't he? He turned and moseyed on his way. Leaving some very confused guards watching.